NEWBIE364NOORTONDS

This is a post about my vent.

Dear Somebody.

In this vent I'd like to tell you something that you know, but you avoid from it, and throw it away far far and so far away untill I can't to get it again.

I believe you've known it, cause I ever told it to you before, now I'll try to grab it again, it like you're going to give it to me but sometime like you keep it away, hate when I am in this bad condition, jealous when see you're talking with a guy and I knew he's like you too, but I can't to ban you, cause that's not my right.

become your admire is enough for me, eventough sometimes when I am boring about something I see your images album and try to knowing every particular object about you.

say everything, say what you want that's a right title for this status : I could said to be a "LOSER" cause I never have a girl for 21 years, might many people though I am a gay cause it, but they were wrong about it, it was a big mistake, first I falling in love when I was 16 years old, I show how I fell to her but its not full of hearth and I was doubt about it, maybe that's the reason why I was rejected, and another factor is face factor, economic factor maybe ? hurt, so much hurt even it very hurt me more than a week, hard to forget what was happened on that day, I fell I'm a loser every time I meet her I always scare to talk to her, nervous looks like every single word I say to her are wrong, many times and many way I used to forget her, but the results is naught. someday I try to approach someone but I doubt any more I give her so much care, so much greeting every morning and every evening, until someday she told me if she love me, but I declined her at the time, feel guilty, I try to approaching a girl anymore and this one I preced by another guy  was unlucky in matters of love you know  just an IDIOT GUY who still waiting someone that clearly doesn't love him, what's wrong with hope  you know ? I have the right to love a perfect girl even I know I am not perfect. don't know what the reason I write it to public, I just want to alert you to not be a loser cause a girl like what I did, in my argue "Tell her what's your felling, because you don't know what will gonna be happened after that, and you have to be ready to accept all of probably"  honestly I am sicked of this feeling, but I hate to make my hearth break twice  keep it deeply and just watch her happy out there  god please give me a right girl even if I am not a right guy for her, i'll be right for her over time, amen ya rabb  keep spirit for all of you out there who're trying to express your love to her !! keep spirit !! and ones more you should know I was cried in front of her when she declined  embarrassing if I should remember it again XD hahaha

I ever write it on my facebook :) I just wanna share.
thanks for reading :)
I am Jo and enough for today, see you at the next writing :) good luck !!